About this exercise
This exercise is about getting a sense of what you want to be about in your life: what you want to treat as important and how you want to be with yourself and with others.
There are no right or wrong answers — it is all about noticing what comes up. You will imagine your 80th birthday and write down what arises.
Are you willing to give it a try? If so, press “Next”.
Step 1
Get centered
Take a moment to get centered. Notice your breath and how your body feels. If you like, close your eyes for a minute.
Now imagine moving forward through time: aging and growing older as you move through life. When you are ready, press “Next”.
Step 2
Your 80th birthday
Imagine that you are turning 80 and your friends, family, and coworkers have gathered to celebrate. Imagine what you look like.
Imagine not who you think would likely be there, but who you would most want to be at your 80th birthday party — even if they would be very old by then. There could even be people you have not met yet. Try to really picture who is there.
Who would you want to see at your birthday party?
Write down who came to your celebration.
Step 3
The first speech
Now people start giving speeches. They take turns standing up and speaking about what you have meant to them: what you have stood for as a person, and the impact you have had.
Again, imagine not what they would likely say, but what you would most want them to say if you were bold in this moment. Deep down in your heart, what would you most want others to say about what you have meant?
The first person to stand up is someone very close to you. Try to really hear them speak.
Who is it?
What would you most want to hear about the impact you have had?
Step 4
The second speech
Now the next person stands up. This could be someone from a different part of your life — for example a coworker or a neighbor. For them too, imagine what you would most want to hear about what you have stood for in your life.
Who is it?
What would you most want to hear?
Step 5
Coming back
Thank your mind for this experience and gently bring your attention back to the present moment. Notice your breath and how your body feels. When you are ready, write down what came up.
What thoughts and feelings did you notice?
Step 6
What is behind this
Read what you wrote. What values stand behind these words — how do you want to be with yourself and with other people?
My values
Hints
- A value is a choice, not a “should”.
- A value is an ongoing direction, not a specific goal.
- A value describes how you act (the quality of action), not an emotion or an object.
- To care about something is to be vulnerable to it: pain and values are connected.
Done
Here is what you wrote. Save your answers to a file — you can bring it to a session and talk it through.
Your answers stay on this page in your browser and are not sent anywhere. The file is saved as .txt.