About this exercise
When we think about making changes, most of us do not consider all the “sides” in a complete way. Instead, we do what we think we “should”, avoid what we do not feel like doing, or feel confused and give up thinking about it. Thinking through the pros and cons of both changing and not changing helps make sure you have fully considered the decision — and helps you hang on to your plan in times of stress or temptation.
Mixed feelings are normal when making decisions. The decision can be of any size: from choosing a purchase to changing jobs.
Step 1
Which decision are you weighing
Describe the decision or the change you are thinking about.
The decision or change I am thinking about
For example: change jobs, move, quit smoking, have a talk with someone close to me.
Step 2
If I make the change
Just write whatever comes to mind — one item per line.
Pros of changing
What good will you get from this decision? How will your life change for the better?
Cons of changing
What will you lose? How much worse will your life get? In what way?
Step 3
If I do not change anything
Now the same for the option of leaving things as they are.
Pros of not changing
What is good about staying as things are?
Cons of not changing
What will you lose, or what will it cost you, if nothing changes?
Step 4
My table
Here is everything you wrote. If you can, take a pause and come back to the list later. For now, mark the items that play a key role in your life.
Try these arguments on: notice how they land with you. Compare the pros and cons and ask yourself: is it worth it?
What I notice when I look at the table
Step 5
It is your decision
You are the one who decides what it will take to tip the scale. Answer a few questions.
The most important reason I want to change
If someone gave you $5 million to make this change for just one day, would you do it, and why?
What steps would you have to take to make the change happen and thus receive the $5 million?
What values and meanings stand behind the most important items?
My decision
Here are your table and answers. Save or print them — you can talk them through in a session.
Decision
Your answers stay on this page in your browser and are not sent anywhere. The file is saved as .txt.